Rejuvination and Relaxation

I did it. I unplugged for the weekend. And it was great! All day Saturday I lounged around home (stayed in my PJs all day). I did some meditation, reading, drawing, a bit of writing and some housework. No TV, no computer, no phone, no radio. Just peace and quiet. Sunday I was a bit more "plugged in" since I watched some online tutorial videos for a software program I'm trying to learn (my trial membership expires in a couple days and I needed to watch a bunch more yet). Then mid-day I headed out to do some Goodwill bargain shopping. We've got three very good stores in my area, so I'd planned to hit them all. But 10 minutes in the first store and I knew that's not what I wanted. (But not before I scored a major find! Got about $300-$400 worth of 100% mohair or 100% lambs wool yarn for $15!) So I drove over the a City park that runs along the River in town after trying the shopping thing. I always keep my beach chair in the trunk along with a stash of magazines and reading material. So I planted myself next to the river for about 4 hours on Sunday afternoon and enjoyed the quiet. There were some fishermen and picnickers a ways off, but otherwise I was pretty secluded. I finally plugged back in fully when I got home Sunday evening. Caught up on emails and watched the news and chatted with my BFF on the phone for a bit. It was a good weekend. I'd like to plan "Unplugged Days" more often. Maybe once a month or so? It really feeds the soul. I highly recommend it. ~Pam

Overdrawn

I'm overdrawn. My emotional bank is in the red because I've been writing too many checks and not receiving enough deposits.

These past couple weeks have been filled to overflowing with obligations, giving support to others, lots of brain work at the office and many other forms of giving, giving, giving. Because of this blog and my involvement on OH and my support groups - there seems to be a lot of demand on my time and resources to give support to others. I'm not complaining. I like to help others and do what I can to support them. But sometimes (a lot of times) I don't balance out all those withdrawals with enough rejuvinating deposits.

It seems like I say this a lot - every couple months or so. Always whining that I'm tired or that I run around too much or that I'm not home enough. I know I say it often and at regular intervals and my regular readers are probably tired of my whining. LOL I've really been trying to take more time for myself lately - like spending the day at the beach three weeks ago was a nice day off for me. But these little days of rejuvination can't be spread out so much. One day every three or four weeks simply isn't enough.

What am I going to do?

Day of Silence. I read an article a few weeks ago in my Yoga magazine about a woman who takes a vow of silence twice a month. Unplug everything -- TV, computer, phone, radio -- and just spend the day in quiet contemplation. She goes about her day as normal but she does it in silence without any outside distractions like books or magazines or electronics.

So I'm going to give a try. I still need to decide what level of "unpluggedness" I'm going to shoot for though. I'll definitely unplug the TV and computer and phone. But I really feel that this type of day needs to be finding things that relax me and give me a boost in my spirit. So spending time with my camera fits into the "boost my spirit" category. Also relaxing on the patio with a good book or magazine is important to me. Quiet meditative music seems to be in too. I'm sure there will be some spa treatments involved -- manicure? pedicure? bubble bath? ... or maybe all three?

Will I be able to do it both Saturday and Sunday? Or is it better to just do one day this first time out? I don't know yet. If this first Day of Silence works for me, I would like to schedule more at regular intervals.

I'll give a report on Monday...

~Pam

Results or Process

My friend Nik posed a question today. Are you results oriented or process oriented? Here's a bit about what she meant:

For some of us this so-called “honeymoon,” carries us through to goal. For others it leaves you very close but not quite. And that’s where that results-driven attitude can get you into trouble. Then one day I came to realize this—I do truly want to be happy. With my life. With my self. With my body. With my purpose on this planet. In order to do that I had to be more process oriented. That is to say, that I had to place my primary focus on how I was accomplishing a healthy life instead of the results of that healthy life.

Her words hit home for me. I've been dealing with this exact transition over the past few months. As you know I've struggled with the scale this year and I have expressed my frustration to you all often. I wanted to share my response to her question...

Just like you, Nik, I had a really tough time transitioning from a results oriented mentality to a process orientation. I went through a pretty bad bout of rebellion when I got so fed up with the scale -- no matter what I do it doesn't move. Exercise more. Exercise less. Change my exercise. Eat more. Eat less. Change what I'm eating. Drink my water. Dont' drink my water. The scale simple does not move any more. It has it's range and it bounces all over the place within that range. 185 to 190... could be any number within that range on any given day. I've been stuck in this range for 8 months now. One year ago last week I hit the 100 lbs lost mark. If I count the scale fluctation, in the past year I've lost a total of between 9 - 14lbs. A whole dang year and only 9 freaking pounds?! It is really hard to stay motivated with those kinds of numbers. (I know, stop saying only.) So I've had to transition from results oriented to process oriented. I've been actively working on it since about May or June. I'm not 100% there yet. The emotional struggle is grueling and some days I don't want to fight any more. But at least I know that's the direction I need to head -- I need to realize that this is life. I'm eating for my healthful lifestyle. I'm exercising for my health and fitness. I'm drinking water and taking vitamins for my health. It's not for weight loss or results on the scale. It's to be healthy.

Will I lose more weight? Yeah... I expect I will eventually. Very slowly. Ounces at a time now instead of pounds. I have another 30-ish pounds to lose before I reach the 160-mark I originally set for myself. If I lost 10 pounds a year, that means I'll be at goal in 3 years. I have, what, another 35-45 years to live.... so 3 years out of those 45 isn't that big of a deal right? But for now? I'm pretty happy with my body, happy with my health, happy that I am athletic and fit and another thing ... I'm just happy to be able to fit in with and look like a normal person (not the fattest girl in the room, just a normal sized person who blends in with everyone else).

This journey is about the rest of my life. It's not about what size jeans I wear today or what the scale will tell me tomorrow. This is my life.

More Race Stuff

Two weeks ago I walked the 10 mile race course during the practice run. A couple weeks before that I walked most of the course with my training group (about 8.75 miles). Both of those training sessions were done much faster than my official race time and both had been done on much hotter days - basically I worked harder the two previous times than I did on Saturday. So why am I so much more sore this time around? Remember the ankle injury from a year ago? That's been bothering me all year and I've just been walking with some low-level pain since then because it doesn't seem to want to heal, so figured that's just how life is. Now that ankle is hurting much worse than it has in the past several months and I'm limping a bit today. Remember the knee pain I've been complaining about lately? Although it is a bit tender today, it's not nearly as bad as the ankle. The knee has been what's bothered me all during this training season and has been progressively getting worse, so for it to not be "that bad" after the race on Saturday is surprising. And perplexing. So for now I'm going to baby my body a bit. Let the ankle heal again before I push too hard doing anything else. Which is annoying, of course. I still want to continue my Travel Race Mania goals (2 races per month through October). But that last race of the season is not going to be the half marathon I'd planned. I've got some race applications for September and will need to pick a couple that are toward the end of the month to give myself time to recover a little, I guess. And will find another couple for October. But the half-marathon isn't happening - in fact, I've already dropped out of the extension training program -- otherwise I would have a scheduled 11 mile training walk coming up next weekend. I'm somewhat disappointed that I won't be ending this season with a half marathon. Kinda. One side of me wants to achieve that goal again, but the other side figures I've already "been there, done that" and I need to move on to something else. I think lately I've been getting bored with walking .... but that's a whole other post and thought process. For now I'll continue with my goal of doing the races as soon as my body recovers some. ~Pam

Race Day

I'm sorry I didn't get this posted yesterday --- it turned into a hectic day and I just didn't have the time.

The Crim 10 mile race went well. I had to part a million miles away from the startline (it was actually about 1.25 miles) and got downtown much later than I'd planned. Met up with my friend Karen and waited for the race to start in the crowd of other racers. It took us about 7 minutes to get to the startline after the race started and we walked a moderate pace the whole way. I knew that Karen doubted that she'd be able to make it so I wanted to stick with her for the race in case she ran into any problems. She did good though!

One major problem of the race course was the lack of restroom facilities. It wasn't until almost halfway through the course when we found he first porta-john and the line up was horrible. It took us a good 5-7 minutes of waiting to get our turn, which seriously cut into our time. It would have been nice to see 2 or 3 facilities at that location instead of just 1. (BTW- see the guy sitting on the lawn next to the potty? Yes, he really did do the whole 10 miles with a cast on his leg and walking on crutches!)

The weather was gorgeous and I''m so thankful we didn't have to battle the typical heat and humidity of August. It was more like a pleasant spring day.

After the race I went to the Flint Farmer's Market to score some goodies. I love that place! They had stuff stacked high in anticipation of the crowds-

and it was definitely crowded. I got some vine ripened tomatoes, yellow grape tomatoes,

zucchini, squash, corn on the cob, green beans, cabbage, red and yellow plums and probably more stuff I can't remember. I'll be cooking later today for sure!

Distance: 10 miles

Time: 3:15:06

Pace: 19:31

Weather: Mid-60's, partly sunny and breeze. Beautiful day!

Race Eve

Tomorrow is the 10-mile Crim race. Last I heard there were about 18,000 race participants signed up with about 5,000 of them doing the 10-miler (they also have a 8k, 5k, 1 mile and a few other races all on the same day). So I'll be in the huge crowd at the startline tomorrow morning at 8:00 a.m. The race is broadcast live on the local TV station and also on their website. See if you can pick me out of the crowd - I'll be the one in a yellow tank top and black shorts. LOL! So today I'm in prep-mode. I'm hitting the water hard today to be super-hydrated for the race. I'm also not limiting carbs much today so my muscles have the glycogen stores they need to get me through the race. Since the alarm goes off at 5am tomorrow, I'll be hitting the hay early tonight for some good sleep. I'm so glad to be walking tomorrow with Karen and possibly Lynn -- both fellow WLS gals who have trained hard this summer to finish the race. April, Lisa, Dennis, Jim, Candise and Mike will also be doing the race tomorrow -- all folks who have had WLS or have been training with us the past few months. I'm hoping to get a group picture! It's exciting to see this opportunity to achieve another goal approaching so quickly. I'll definitely be glad when I cross the finish line and know I have done this again! ~Pam

I'm a lettuce snob

Ok, I admit it. I'm a lettuce snob. If it's not green, is it even lettuce? I mean... c'mon folks, the white core of iceburg lettuce is garbage, please do not put it in my salad. Dang it!

I went to Wendy's for lunch today with the intention of having a chili and a cup of mandarin oranges. But it was too hot for chili, so I opted for a salad instead. 


It's been almost two years (I think) since I'd ordered a Wendy's salad and now I remember why I've stayed away. Not only was there an accumulation of water at the bottom of the bowl, about 2/3 of the lettuce was all white iceburg garbage. 


I was so pissed I even took a picture of it. 


Do I need to give lessons to the Wendy's people on how to make a salad?

Low Carb Blueberry Pancakes

My beautiful friend Nikki is an amazing cook and she's so generous with her recipes and food knowledge. And now she's gotten me hooked on pancakes! She's evil, I tell you... pure evil! Check out her video (her first live cooking demonstration) on how she makes Carbquick pancakes. 


They are SOOO delicious. Because I don't have time during the week to cook breakfast before I leave for work, I've had this for dinner the past two nights. I've modified her big recipe to accomodate my single-serving needs. But before I give you my recipe, let's talk about Carbquik first. It's a low-carb baking mix made from carbalose flour. With only 2g net carbs and 3g protein... this is a great choice for WLS folks. I bought mine from www.Netrition.com but it looks like it's also available on Amazon.

Carbquik Blueberry Pancakes 
(Pam's modified version of Nik's creation) 


1/3 c. Carbquik Baking Mix
2T no-sugar-added applesauce
1 capful Divinci SF vanilla syrup (in the coffee aisle)
1T Splenda
1 egg
fresh blueberries


Mix all ingredients except blueberries. The mixtures should be very thick. In a hot skillet spritzed with cooking spray, drop mixture into small pancake medallians. Immediately plop some fresh blueberries on top of these pancakes and shove the blueberries down into the mix. Flip when ready. Serve with blueberry sauce or SF maple syrup (I don't always like syrup, so I use the blueberry sauce instead). 


Blueberry Sauce
1/2c frozen blueberries
2T Splenda


Mix together and microwave in small bowl for 1 minute. Stir and smash the blueberries with a spoon. Use instead of syrup on top of pancakes.

Thank you Nik! I bow to your greatness!
~Pam

Stop Saying "Only"

*** Pet Peeve Rant Alert *** There is nothing that irks me more than when I see people say, "I've ONLY lost XX pounds."

C'mon people.... let's celebrate our losses and stop being negative about what hasn't happened yet. Stop comparing yourself to what others are doing and focus on your own triumphs. You've lost an "AMAZING xx pounds"... celebrate it.

Stop getting down on yourself for being a success. This isn't a race to a finish line, this is about the rest of your life and there's no rush to get to a goal weight. Enjoy the journey. Take a few minutes to look around and see what fantastic things are happening to you today.

Rejoice in your improving health and how much progress you're making. Be proud of yourself instead of worrying about what else you have yet to do. Be kind to yourself. No more negative self talk, Ok?

~Pam

Race Day

Today was the 5 mile Blueberry Festival Race. It was very humid and I was tired from my playing on the beach all day yesterday. The cool thing about today's race was that Helen and Shannon (the Pink Team from The Biggest Loser) was part of the race. They both walked the race - Helen was fast and hit the front of the pack right away, Shannon was about my same pace and walked just ahead of me most of the race. (I talked to Helen after the race about my GoWear Fit and plaeatu, I'll blog about that another day.)

The other cool thing was that most of my Crim training group just so happened to be there too and I was able to walk with a few of the gals. We've only got 6 days left before the big 10 mile race!

One more cool thing. I place first in my age category. Not bad for an old lady, huh?

Distance: 5 miles

Time: 1:20

Pace: 16:00

Weather: mid-80's, humid with a tiny sprinkle at the end of the race to cool us off

3 years ago I made a decision

August 5, 2006 was the day that I decided to have WLS. Every August since I've gone back to the same spot where I had made that decision to contemplate how far I'd come in the process and what new goals I wanted to set for myself. This weekend I'll make the drive back to that beach and spend some time in meditation and contemplation. The day I decided to have surgery and change my life was also the day that I started this blog. Read the very first post from 3 years ago. ~Pam

GoWear Fit - an update on activity levels

As you all know, I got my GoWear Fit device back in May. So I've been wearing it for about 2.5 months and I've made some changes in my life because of the scientific feedback it gives me. Some changes I'm very aware of... but others have sort of happened subconsicously. Today I'm just going to talk about my activity level. Later I'll talk to you about the difference in my eating habits and my weight loss.

This stuff is fascinating to me! I generally have 3 types of days in my life.

• Sedentary days when I work all day at a desk, then go home or to school and sit for most of the evening. These days have very little activity, just the normal live and work stuff. 
• Normal Active days when I work during the day and do a 1 hour workout in the evening, then do normal putzing around the house at night. 
• Active Days when I either work during the day and do an extended workout in the evening (2-3 hours) .... or weekends when I'm not stuck in the office and I'm just active all day with housework, shopping, playing, walking around and just being active in general for most of the day. I have noticed in the past two months a dramatic change in my calorie burn numbers on these three types of days. I have not made any specific changes in my daily activity... I didn't even discover these changed in the calorie burn totals until I was examining the data a week or so ago.

GoWearFit data in May
Sedentary Days = 1800-2000 calories burned (struggled to hit the daily target of 2000)
Normal Active Days = 2100-2300 calories burned
Active Days = 2300-2500 calories burned

GoWear Fit data in August
Sedentary Days = 2100-2300 calories burned (very easy to hit daily target of 2000)
Normal Active Days = 2300-2500 calories burned
Active Days = 2500-2900 calories burned

So, notice a pattern here?

Somehow in the past 2.5 months I have subconsiously become more active by about 200-300 calories without making any dramatic changes. Simply because this thing is on my arm and I can see the immediate feedback of my activities, it is making me move more.

More to come...

~Pam

Workout vs. Housework

Yesterday I did a little experiment with how I burn calories.

As you know, I wear the GoWear Fit and I am able to track exactly how many calories I'm burning throughout the day. Here are my averages: 2100-2200 -- non active, sedentary days 2300-2500 -- work day with a normal walking workout in the evening 2500-2900 -- active day of errand, shopping, housework with or without a formal workout.

So yesterday I decided to forego my typical 1 hour nature trail workout after work and instead dedicated 1 hour to brisk housework at home. At lunch yesterday I took a short walk (15 minutes) around the parking lot, then hit the grocery store on the way home from work. Then when I got home I cleaned the kitchen and did a bit of decluttering in the storage room, also putzed around getting lunches ready for the rest of the week and organizing cupboard a bit.

So in the end I put in a total of 1 hour of dedicated housework, then another 20-30 minutes of putzing around later.

Here's the comparison on calories burned:

2500 -- what I probably would have burned for the day with the 1 hour walking workout
2380 -- what I did burn without the formal workout and doing housework instead

Not bad, huh? And the best part?

I woke up this morning and walked into a gleaming kitchen. That's enough to put a smile on my face and give me a good start to the day. So today I'm going to mix it up a bit more. Going to see where I end up if I do about 30 minutes of a walking workout and 1 hour of housework. My goal is to find a balance that will keep me up in the 2500-calories-burned range.

Lately I've been feeling like I spend too much time out and about, running around or working out or at meetings and not enough time at home doing what needs to be done to keep a neat and clean home. I feel like lately I've literally just been sleeping at my house - not really living there. I get home late (8-9pm), drop my stuff, grab something to eat and head to bed within an hour or two of getting home. Then weekends are packed with either obligations or going out and playing or doing stuff. My housework has suffered and my goal of decluttering and purging hasn't been worked on at all. So I'm hoping this new balance will still give me the calorie-burn that I want, but also give me a balance in my life that makes me feel like I'm an actual home owner.

I'll keep you posted.

~Pam

Street Festival Fun

So Sunday after I finished the 10 miles in the morning, I decided to drive 40 minutes to the folk music festival. I mean... I'd only walked 10 miles, why not tack on a few more while I was out and about, right? Mostly I wanted to play with my camera and see what fun shots I could get. I got some good ones... but haven't had a chance to fully review or edit the whole batch. But I did get a couple I wanted to share. Lunch was Jamacian Jerk Chicken with all the fixin's. The chicken was a little bit dry, but very spicy and flavorful. The rice and beans were good, but rice doesn't sit well in my pouch, so I only had a few bites. The veggies were delicious and spicy. The cornbread was probably very good fresh out of the oven. I ate about 1/3 of this food before I was stuffed to the gills! There was also a pretty cool area for artisans from all over the world. I'm not sure they actually came from around the world, but they were artisans representing many different cultures and countries. One of the booths was offering Henna Tattoos for a $10 donation to charity. I'd always admired the artwork of henna and wanted to give it a try. Here is a shot I had a bystander take while the gal was painting on my hand. Then below is a shot of the design today. It should last 2-3 weeks before it fades away. The music was great, the sun was shining (although it was very hot and humid) and the crowds were fun to watch. There was dancing and singing going on and I captured the fun atmosphere of the day. I got flirted with a time or two. Mostly I just sat and enjoyed the music and being outdoors on a hot summer day. ~Pam

Practice Race Day

Sunday morning was the practice Crim race. The entire training program (1500-ish people) and anyone else who wanted to run the course informally was invited to do the 10 miles together. I was suppose to meet my regular Tuesday night training group, but could only find 2 members - the rest of the group was no where to be found. So we walked alone. (Eventually a couple other members found us on the course later.) It was HOT. And HUMID. It felt like walking through a sauna and breathing humidifier air. The high of the day was around 94 degrees and I believe it was already creeping into the 80's when we started at 8am. It was exactly the same weather as last year's race and the first really hot and humid day we've had here in Michigan all summer. I was sweating before we even started! But I made pretty good time. In fact, I beat my time from last year by nearly 20 minutes. Now if everyone could please do a dance or sacrifice to the weather gods so we can have some beautiful weather for the real race in two weeks, that'd be nice. Distance: 10 miles Time: 2:56:46 Pace: 17-something Weather: hot, humid, sweltering. Sweated like a pig.

Fermenting Vegetables

My friend Tara has been fermenting veggies. Her's are so beautiful that I wanted to try them myself. Check out Tara's post about how it's done.

Here's my first attempt. Keep your fingers crossed that it works!

Blackberry Yogurt Protein Popsicle

I just received my first edition of the Yoga magazine I subscribed to. So far I'm highly impressed. It's about more than just yoga ... it's about healthy living, meditation and has some amazing recipes too. So when I came across this one for Blackberry Yogurt Popsicles, I had to give it a try. But of course I needed to modify it a bit to make it more WLS friendly. These are SERIOUSLY delicious! I have some raspberries in the fridge and plan to try this recipe with them next.


Blackberry Yogurt Protein Popsicles


2 containers Carbmaster Vanilla Yogurt 
2 scoops vanilla protein powder
6-10 oz blackberries - (juice only)
1/3 c. Guava Nectar (recipe called for Agave Nectar, but I didn't have any)
2 tablespoons lemon juice
1 teaspoon vanilla


In a blender puree the blackberries (recipe called for 10oz, but I only had a 6oz package and it worked fine). Pour pureed blackberries into a mesh strainer and let the juice seep through - you will probably need to press the mixture through with a spoon. Discard the seeds and pulp.


In a bowl mix yogurt, protein powder, nectar, lemon juice and vanilla until well blended (I used a whisk). Add the blackberry juice and mix. Pour into popsicle molds and freeze for at least 8 hours. My popsicle molds held 1/2 cup of the mixture and made 7 servings. 


With that serving size the following stats apply:
Calories: 70 Fat: 1g Carbs: 5.5g Fiber: 1.5g Protein: 11g

Dating

Several months ago I talked about dating. At that time I decided it wasn't a priority for me and that I wanted to focus on making new friends. Well, I've done that and I feel like my circle of friends is larger than it was a year ago. And I have friends who are not just from the WLS community, so that's a bonus, right? But now I think I'm ready to start dating again. Being single is great most of the time - but sometimes it's just too darned lonely. I'd like to find Mr. Right before I'm 75 years old. How on earth I'll fit one more thing into my hectic schedule... I don't know. But I want to try. So if any of my local friends are reading this and know of an eligible bachelor - I might be up for a blind date or something. Yikes! Did I just say that? ~Pam

Bikers Butt

My butt hurts! Who invented those tiny bike seats anyway? Don't they know we have bigger butts than that?!

So my doc recommended I try a different exercise besides walking because of the problems I've been having with my knee and the ongoing injury of my ankle.

I've been considering buying a bike and getting into cycling. Before I invested the money though, I wanted to give it a try. It's been years since I owned a bike and needed to make sure it was going to be something I'd enjoy. So I borrowed my nephew's bike and when for a spin. Actually I went about 12 miles this evening.

The good news --- I loved biking! It was so fast and I covered so many miles. While walking one of my biggest complaints is that it takes so long. So I loved that I could go so far and have the wind blowing in my face. Lots of fun.

The bad news --- My knee killed me! (The butt thing is just a side bonus.) In fact, my knee hurt so bad that for several hours after the bike ride I was limping when I walked.

So I guess buying a bike is out of the question. Saves me a few hundreds bucks, but not I'm back to the drawing board to find what works for the knee.

~Pam

PS -- the pic here was taken with my Palm Pre while I was out riding.

Doing the FlyLady Boogie Today

I'm on a 10 minute break, so I have to type fast. Today I'm doing the FlyLady Boogie -- basically a method of cleaning the house top to bottom in small spurts of activity tempered with smaller spurts of relaxation. So I'm doing 20 minutes of hard, focused housework and 10 minutes of guiltless relaxation. I've been at it for about 2.5 hours so far and plan to continue for another few hours.

My focus is "Trash" and "Charity" today. Trying to throw as much stuff away as possible and fill as many boxes of donate-able stuff as I can. This is mostly about deep down spring cleaning (so I'm a couple months late).

I started a master to-do list and have been adding to it as I think of more things. Not all of it will be done today -- in fact, not even a small percentage will be done today. But it'll be a list I can work from over the next couple weeks. Little 20 minute projects that I can check off little by little.

Ok, the alarm just went off and my break is done. Back to work for another 20 minutes.

~Pam