Who are you? Who are you at the core of your being? What does that person look like in the mirror - not the physical mirror, but the mirror of your soul. Do you know? Have you looked closely enough to recognize your true self and fully understand who you are?
Once we know who we are at the core of our being --- then it will become clear who we are NOT. What characteristics do not define you and need to be eliminated? What traits do not coincide with your core identity and need to be changed? What steps must I take to allow my true self identity to be released and able to shine through? What specifically will I work on TODAY that gets me closer to my ultimate goal of understanding who I am at the core of my being?
Sometimes it's difficult to distinguish between WHO I am and WHAT I am. I am not my job. I am not my family (sister, daughter, granddaughter, aunt, cousin, neice). I am not the roles I play (support group leader, source of information on WLS, student, teacher). All those things say what I do but do not define who I am. Maybe making a list of what I am and what roles I play will help me better identify what things should not go on my list for self identity.
These are the questions I'm working through right now. It is something we've discussed in past sessions of Graduate School therapy and dug into more detail last night during the session.
Once we understand fully who we are and what our core identity is, we are better able to face the daily struggles and stresses of life. It will also help us get to the root cause of our morbid obesity (and avoid letting ourselves return to obesity), understand our disfunctional relationships with food and how to fix that disfunction and also give us the tools we need to battle emotional upheaval in our lives when we're faced with it (at least that's what Dr. W. tells us).
I'm putting this out here today to not only give you a peek into what we're dealing with in this therapy session and what's happening inside my head these days. But I'm also sharing this jumble of questions in case you want to work on this project too. It's going to take time and patience with myself, I know. But if I attack it in a methodical way, it's like "eating an elephant" - one bite at a time.
~Pam
Pam- I sooo get this for sure.. I am dealing with some of these core issues with my therapy sessions too. I am dealing with the stuff that I am NOT and who I want in my life and those that I do. It is ironic that you are dealing with this too. I am very deep into some stuff from throughout my life. I think it will get to the bottom of things with me but it will not be an easy road as you can tell.
ReplyDelete@Oesch -- Yep, it's gonna be a process for sure. But I'm also excited about the discovery and learning. I thought I had a pretty good handle on who I was but when I had to actually write down what that meant, I kept coming up with the "what I am" list instead. Wishing you the best as you dig for your truth too.
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