Sometimes it feels like I’ve been doing this thing forever and my memory of life before surgery gets foggy at times.
I feel normal and healthy and like this is how I’ve lived all along. I guess the reality must be somewhere in between those two extremes. At the beginning of this WLS journey I took a 10-week group therapy class that helped me focus on a whole life Wellness Plan.
In that plan I set specific goals for myself in various areas of my life. I didn’t want this journey to be only about eating and exercising – I wanted to take the opportunity for change and really work on any area of my life that I felt needed work.
- Spiritual health
- financial health
- intellectual health
- emotional health
- relationship health
- vocational health
I’m doing great on eating and exercise – that seems to be a given at this point. I’ve lost 83 pounds, I’ve dropped five pant sizes, I’m wearing XL shirts (sometimes L) and people are calling me skinny (even though I’ve got a ways to go before that title is actually true).
I’ve joined the Crim Fitness Training and I'm training for a half-marathon - I’m exercising regularly, so I’ve got that part covered too. But I feel like I haven’t been working on any of those other goals on my list.
Yes, I know that during the first few months after surgery that I can’t do much besides focus on eating and exercising, so I shouldn’t be too hard on myself. But these past few weeks I’ve felt like I’ve let myself down in some ways. I’ve been so driven to get physically healthy, that I’ve been ignoring the other areas of health I want to focus on. The thing that’s been bothering me for the past few weeks is that I feel like I’ve failed because I haven’t been working on those other goals. Got a lot of self-talk going on in my head lately. The devil side keeps saying how bad I am and what a failure I’m going to be because I can’t even accomplish the goals I’ve set for myself. “Bad Pam!” But the angel side reassures me that I’m doing good and how successful I’ve been so far and reminds me of what great things I have in store for myself. “Go Pam!”
So where do I go from here?
Well, I’m at the 6-month mark and I really want to deal with the rest of these goals in the next 6 months. There are 6 remaining goals to tackle. So I will focus on one single goal for each of the next six months. Each new goal will be added on top of the heap – meaning just because the month changes doesn’t mean I’ll abandon the goal from last month, I’ll continue working on each as I go along, just add a new task each month. So here’s my schedule:
- May 13- June 13 Spiritual Health
- June 13- July 13 Financial Health
- July 13- August 13 Emotional Health
- September 13- October 13 Relationship Health
- October 13- November 13 Intellectual Health
November 13th will bring me full circle to my 1 year surgery anniversary. So I’m pushing back the devil and listening to the angel.
I can accomplish my goals.
I will succeed!
I am brave enough.
I am stronger than myself!
~Pam
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